This is written for the shield of my heart. This is written for the shoulder I always lean on. This is written for my one and only marvelous friend. This is written for a great person. This is written for the possible future Imam. This is written for someone who made me strong whenever I felt weak. This is written for someone who knows clearly my perspectives in life. This is written for the one who does not judge me for whatever I do. This is written for the miracles in you. This is written for you.
I know we don’t have many things in common. We don’t like the same television programs. We don’t support the same political parties. We don’t go to the same events. We don’t eat the same food. We don’t like the same person. We don’t view religions the same way. We laugh upon different jokes. We pray for different things. We don’t have the same ambition. We don’t get along with the same crowd. We are just different. This is me and that’s you.
You watch Prison Break with your uncle. I watch Gossip Girl with my girl friends. You go home every break and I don’t even plan to go home for two or three years. You focus on the geometry of rationality while I really admire the art of emotions. You disapprove pre-marital relationships while I glorify the joy of polyamory. You listen to Aiman's song while I buy Leona Lewis' albums.You have selflessness as your ultimate principle while I have selfishness as my religion. You get what you work for while I always get everything by luck. You care about others and I care about no one. And because of that, you get me, caring about you. Always.
I still remember three years ago when we first met, you and I had the best introduction session. We talked for the entire night. We filled the night with laughter of jubilancy and tears of excitement. We made the bond within a few hours. We built the chemistry between us fast. We claimed a friendship almost immediately. You told me all the circumstantial details of your high school life. You provided me with the best gist of boy stories. You excited the flame of attention when it was almost extinguished by the dust of drowsiness. You talked about almost everything. Everything, from school dormitories to Cheras., from Cheras to stealing food at some random open house, and from a religious school in Perlis to your allergy to milk, was mentioned. I’m so sorry if I couldn’t recall much. I failed to trace back those wonderful stories you shared with me. I am so so sorry for that. You have a good memory. I don’t.
Ok, my dear friends. Three years of our friendship has taught me lots of things. You made me believe they are still really good religious people out there. You made me believe that not everyone is like him. You made me believe that people can be the symbol of Islam for reasons that are not worldly-based. You made me believe people of different virtues could lead an honest friendship. You made me believe hopes always exist. You made me believe Zaim will never die. You made me believe in me. Thank you.
Let’s talk about the first semester. I really appreciated it when you actually helped me out when my mom wanted to bank in some cash for me during our early months in INTI. I really appreciated it when you liked the specially decorated orange I made for your 18th birthday. I really appreciated it that you were contented with such a small celebration. I really appreciated it that you smiled when I presented it to you. I really appreciated it when you did not mind sharing all your crazily delicious homemade chocolate cakes. I really appreciated it when you did not mind sharing your skills in cooking, and of course baking when asked. I really appreciated it when you were so generous to give me a large portion of your stupid Jacob’s biscuits, the one in yellow can if you remembered. I really appreciated it when you allowed me to sleep with your yellowish green comforter whenever I needed a variety in sense of comfort. I really appreciated it when you let me answer the Agar-Agar girl on behalf of you. I really appreciated it when you showed off with photos of crabs you had during a barbeque dinner. I really appreciated it when you wholeheartedly used yahoo messenger’s photo sharing application for that. I really appreciated it when you made fun of me. I really appreciated it when you appreciated the kampong boy who always wore singlets and baju melayu around the corridor of third floor as your friend. I really appreciated it when you appreciated me.
Let’s talk about the second semester. You were there when I needed someone to accompany me buying a translation of the holy Quran. You were there with me in Sogo. You were there when I needed someone to keep track of my religious practices. You were there when I tried to be a better person. You were there in the mosque with Abu T. You were there with Amri to say “Ye ke?” hilariously. You were there supporting me to fast when I didn’t need to. You were there when we all needed a clown during our short jaunt to Cameron Highland. You were there buying strawberry tea for your family. You were were particular about buying things for your family. You were there when I was too sleepy to study for my MPW test. You were there drinking coffee to keep me accompanied. You were there at Abukkas when I needed some fellas to hang out with. You were also there when their management changed. You were basically there whenever I needed a friend. You were just there.
Let’s talk about the third semester. We definitely need to talk about the first night I arrived INTI that semester. We definitely need to talk about my blond hair. We definitely need to talk about our bakery moments. We definitely need to talk about watching AF6 finale together. We definitely need to talk about your extremely low points. We definitely need to talk about the loss of your grandma.We definitely need to talk about someone with the brain cancer. We definitely need to talk about sending Naim off at the airport. We definitely need to talk about me doing my CSC works with your laptop. We definitely need to talk about you laughing at my decision to not sleep for a 2% quiz. We definitely need to talk about me missing untraced. We definitely need to talk about some KBU people I stalked. We definitely need to talk about my spontaneous decision to go to Shamila’s sister’s wedding. We definitely need to talk about the fact I never remembered her name. We definitely need to talk about all those if you want to.
Let’s talk about the fourth semester, the final semester I spent with you. This was the semester I told you everything. This was the semester I decided not to hide things from you. This was the semester I thought we had celebrated joy, happiness, and friendship to the utmost. This was the semester I spent days and nights hanging out with you. This was the semester you were deadly busy preparing for your last series of finals. This was the semester we had that ‘drunk’ conversation. This was the semester you were traumatized by the “sesuatu di belakang” joke. This was the semester I cut my hair short and dyed it black. This was the semester I was gone during my birthday. This was the semester you and Amri bought me a birthday cake. This was the semester I cursed Statistics like hell and you made fun of it. This was the semester I abandoned Biology test for a night out with Adibah and friends. in Putrajaya and Subang. This was the semester we did stupid things on the highly sophisticated Putrajaya bridge. This was the semester you pointed at me which building would be the office of you in the future. This was the semester you didn’t mind paying extra money for the ‘raya’ biscuits I sold. This was the semester you accepted my wild behaviors in front of a waiter in Abbukas. This was the semester we had so much fun at MCS ‘raya’ party. This was the semester I decided to stay longer at INTI to accompany you and Amri. This was the semester I first got to know Kagurazaka. This was also perhaps the semester I tried to steal someone’s photo from your phone and got busted. This was the semester we pretended as if we were not in the room to not let someone in. This was the semester our sense of unity was official. This was the semester I think we were truly bonded with each other.
Let’s talk about the fifth semester, the semester that you were not around me. I loved the fact that we laughed like hell on the phone for a few hours during the New Year’s Eve. I loved the fact that we kept the friendship between us alive when we were no longer around each other. I loved the fact that you invited me to your farewell party at your house. I loved the fact that you finally introduced me to your brother and family. I loved the fact that I finally could see the faces of your family members that you never forgot to be concerned about. I loved the fact that you and Amri spent lot of time with me before and after your pre-departure briefing. I loved the fact that I was the first person to arrive at the airport to send you off to Australia. I loved the fact that I was the friend who cried the most there. I loved the fact that your mom remembered me for that. I loved the fact that you called me YemYem. I loved the fact you completely treated me in our last meal together at the food court. I loved the fact that you were looking really good in the blazer at the airport. I loved the fact that you did not forget to call me when you were in Australia. I loved the fact that you proved distance didn't kill us. I loved the fact that I missed you like hell.
Let’s talk about the life after INTI, the real life. You were there whenever I really needed someone to talk to. You were there whenever I felt down and emotional. You were there whenever I was greatly destroyed. You were there whenever God tried my patience. You were there updating me about your life whenever I needed a sense of sharing between friends. You were there whenever the sacred failed to prove their sacredness. You were there whenever I was in need of cash. You were there making a video for my video with Amri when I really needed a sense of birthday celebration in the US. You were there explaining all your situations, the personal and the public whenever I had doubts in you. You were there when I cried so crazily last spring. You were there motivating me to breathe again. You were there reminding me that the world is bigger than I thought. You were there to praise me after I got 3.5 GPA. You were there whenever I wanted a friend to trust me. You were there when everything started to break loose. You were basically there whenever I needed a friend. You were just there.
May Allah forgive your sins. May Allah make all your dreams and visions come true. May Allah make you one of His Rijal. May Allah bless you everyday. May Allah make your dream internship come true. May Allah grant a place in heaven for you. May Allah make all the unconcluded chapters in your life concluded. May Allah make all the impossible possible for you. May Allah give more years for you to live. May Allah make you a better person. For a better end.
Thanks for everything you’ve done to me. Thanks for all the memories, the good or the bad. Thanks for being you.
You have been such an extraordinary gift to me. I hope you like it. Happy 21st birthday, Muhamad Nur Farhan Bin Muhamad Fadzil.
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